A Filipino Politician is trying to save his countrypeople from heartbreak and confusion by putting together a bill that would make ghosting illegal.
Arnolfo Teves, Jr, a member of the Nationalist People’s Coalition, wants to ban ghosting because of the pain, shock, and insecurity it can cause.
“Ghosting - when someone cuts off all forms of communication,” the bill reads, “can be mentally, physically, and emotionally exhausting to the ‘ghosted person’.
Sounds like Arnolfo has been ghosted before. We are with you mate, it sucks.
He even gets the science out that PROVES ghosting legit hurts.
“Studies have shown that social rejection of any kind activates the same pathways in the brain as physical pain, meaning that there is a biological link between rejection and pain.”
Another line in the bill proves without doubt that someone has done Mr Teves Jr. dirty before.
“The ambiguity with ghosting is that there is no real closure between the parties concerned and as such, it can be likened to a form of emotional cruelty and should be punished as an emotional offence because of the trauma it causes to the ‘ghosted’ party.”
That’s the thing with ghosting that makes it suck so bad - the not knowing.
Sharon Draper, a relationship expert and psychologist, talked to Pedestrian.TV about ghosting. She said that when you get ghosted, your brain tries to find a reason why, and rather than saying: 'they just suck', your lovely brain usually says: 'hey maybe you suck'.
“Not knowing what is going cause your mind to fill in the blanks,” she said.
“Often it’s not with the most helpful of thoughts. These thoughts can affect your self-esteem and confidence in future dating situations, and can make you expert the worse, even when it might not be the case.”
She also provides some words of wisdom, saying that when ghosted, it’s really not about you.
“It’s important for people to remember that ghosting is not a reflection of their self-worth; nor is any other form of rejection… [it] has more to do with the person doing the ghosting than the person being ghosted.”
As much as I’d love to see everyone that’s ever ghosted me be punished for it, it’s hard to see how this bill would actually be enforced.
And besides, sometimes there are legitimate reasons for ghosting - when wanting to get out of an abusive relationship or other dangerous situations - and other times people just forget (I’m sorry Hannah, please don’t send me to jail).