The ultimate basic b*tch guide to beauty brands and what they say about you
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The ultimate basic b*tch guide to beauty brands and what they say about you

I woke up today and chose violence - continue with care!

Today I woke up and chose violence by grilling you on your go-to beauty brands. For the sake of inclusivity, I’ll be roasting low-end makeup brands because no matter how boujee you’ve gotten with your beauty routine, you can’t tell me you didn’t start your journey without a Maybelline item.

There are two types of Revlon girlies, those whose mum introduced them to makeup and others who had no clue about makeup when getting their first foundation. Revlon stans aren’t passionate about makeup and have only watched two makeup tutorials in their life. They love feeling better than Maybelline fans because Revlon’s counted as ‘prestige’ but let’s be real… make-up is make-up kings, queens and everyone in-between. It’s not what you have, it’s how you use it!

Listen, Maybelline stans do what they’re told and feel good about it. If you tell them to do something enough, they’ll get it done. Unlike Revlon users, Maybelline girls are up to date with most of the latest trends. They’re ballers on a budget and know everything about the range. They aren’t risk-takers though! Before purchasing they’ve read/watched a minimum of five reviews. Good for you!

I hate to break it to you hun, but it's not 2012 anymore… It’s been 11 years and tbh that bronzer that’s been sitting at the bottom of your makeup bag for the last 5 should well be in the bin by now. Rimmel girls are very much giving no colour-match energy! Oh, and would it hurt you to wipe your mascara off before bed?

There are only two things this tells me about you and that’s A: you love a cheap dupe because you can’t be effed spending some actual money on higher-end products, B: You’ll never say no to a quick Kmart trip. The unfortunate thing about this is that you tell yourself you don’t need the finer things in life, but always end up walking out with over $100 worth of items in your trolley… It’s okay, you’re not alone!

Chi Chi
Probably a huge fan of Shaaanxo back in the day, Chi Chi girls love a colourful makeup look. If you haven’t heard of Chi Chi they’ll tell you all about how pigmented their eyeshadows are. You’re either twelve or thirty-two, there is no in-between. People who wear Chi Chi are bold and aren’t aiming for a natural look. 

No matter which brand you use, it’s fair to say 2023 should be the year for change. Heck, why not stock your makeup bag with all of the above? That’ll really cause some chaos and I’m totally here for it!